“Do you wanna dance?” A question guaranteed to strike fear
in the heart of any red-blooded, American male.
The other day I was having a
conversation with a female friend of mine and the conversation turned to
leisure time activities. She mentioned
that she often enjoyed going dancing with her girl friends. We agreed that
women do, as a general rule, like to dance and are less than particular with
whom. They will dance with men, acquaintances or strangers, women, groups of
people or by themselves. That is because women dance for the sake of dance, no
other motivation is needed.
You can dance, every dance
With the guy who gave you the eye
Let
him hold you tight.
You
can dance, every dance
With
the man who held your hand
In the
pale moonlight
But
don’t forget who’s takin’ you home
And in
whose arms you’re gonna be.
So
darling, save the last dance for me!
Men, conversely, hate to dance. They instinctively know how
foolish they look trying to move in rhythm to music for which they have no
affinity. Well, this applies to straight
men anyway. Gay men dance (not that
there’s anything wrong with that) to the beat of a different drummer which is
apparently out of the auditory range of the straight guy. None the less,
straight men dance. Why would this be?
Oh I
know, that the music’s fine
Like
sparkling wine
Go and
have your fun.
Laugh
and sing
But
while we’re apart
Don’t
give your heart to anyone.
Cause
don’t forget who’s takin’ you home
And in
whose arms you’re gonna be.
So
darling, save the last dance for me!
My friend agreed, when pressed for an explanation as to why
men willingly, even eagerly engage in an activity they find so inherently
repugnant: Men dance to get women (she is so delicate in her use of language;
you or I would have made reference of the mechanics of avian
reproduction). And thus we have defined
the underlying motivation for rhythmic gesticulation among the males of the
species.
Baby
don’t you know I love you so?
Can’t
you feel it when we touch?
I will
never, never let you go.
I love
you oh so much!
In
aboriginal cultures, dance ritual is closely tied to nature based religious
ceremony. And what is the purpose? To ensure fertility!
Slavic and
Mediterranean men participate in traditional group dancing. Why? Their liquor
is not strong enough to dull their senses to the extent needed to perceive
their women as attractive.
Scots,
sporting the traditional kilt in cooler northern hills, need to get the blood
flowing before retiring to the bridal chamber.
Pacific
Islanders? Okay, you might have me
here. Maybe there are mosquitoes in the
grass skirts! But mosquitoes can’t mate unless gorged on blood.
From the time a young man first slips off his Converse
All-Stars in the Junior High gym to the day he breaks his hip at his
grand-niece’s wedding, it’s all about the mating ritual.
You
can dance, go carry on
‘Til
the night is gone
And
it’s time to go.
If he
asks, “If you’re all alone,
Can he
walk you home?”
You
must tell him no.
‘Cause
don’t forget who’s takin’ you home
And in
whose arms you’re gonna be.
So
darling, save the last dance for me!
Mmmm-mmm-mmm!
Save
the last dance for me.
Addendum
The following e-mail message was issued to members of my
blog notification list on the occasion of my 1,000th page read,
occurring May 13th. If you
wish to be added to the notification list, send me an e-mail ( dale.holbrook@sbcglobal.net -or- daleholbrookoutwest@gmail.com
).
Mon, May 13, 2013
5:16:53 PM
Yes! Yes! Yes... er,
no...
|
From:
|
Dale
Holbrook
<dale.holbrook@sbcglobal.net>
View Contact
|
|
|
To:
|
...you are not being treated to an extra post this week. I
just wanted to share (hmm, never occurred to me that you might not be
interested) that I experienced my 1,000th page read this afternoon (5/13/13) at
4:30 PDT. That's 2130 Zulu (? if I did the math right) for you mil heads out there.
Some interesting facts:
There have been sixteen posts in total. The most hits went
to the first real story, "The Great Potato Excursion" (2/2/13) with
fifty-three followed closely by "...and Taxes" (4/11/13) with fifty;
which had nothing to do with taxes but quite by coincidence was posted four
days before our national filing date. I wonder if I just happened to pick up
some hits by people using a crappy search engine who were desperate for last
minute advice... oh, well!
The ignominious distinction of fewest hits is shared by
"Leap Day" (4/4/13) and "A Sticky Test" (4/18/13) with 12
each; two of my favorites.
Although 788 hits have occurred in the USA, I have a truly
international audience, including but not limited to:
Germany
(friends of Nicky)
Mexico
(friends of Chris)
New Zealand
(friends of Frank)
Russia
Latvia
Romania
(communist friends of Brenda?)
I want to thank all of you for indulging my ego-trip but
specifically; Nick for helping me navigate the roiling waters of blog-site
opportunities; Brenda for recognizing that I am a writer, not a blogger; and
Tinkerbelle for pushing me over the inertia hump to get this thing started.
No, I am not taking the week off to celebrate; I am in the
midst of a brain fever readying this week's submission... stand by!
Congratulations on 1,000 hits!
ReplyDelete